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  • Writer's pictureRegan Franklin

Are You Ready to Get Out of Your Own Way? Then STOP!

Hot headed much? Do you keep putting your foot in your mouth? Do you find yourself constantly in the throws of miscommunication? Ready to connect with people on a deeper level? Then STOP here and see what you can do to help this process along!


  1. Uncover WHY you miscommunicate.

  2. STOP & Upgrade your communication skills!

  3. Who can help you pave the road for smooth communication and get out of your own way?

  4. Go out and have new experiences with your new skills!

Uncover WHY you miscommunicate.

To discover why you get stuck in your miscommunication storyline again and again, an examination of what you believe and perceive to be true coming from yourself and others needs to happen. Starting here informs you of where your vulnerabilities are that continually launch you into your style of "connecting" with others and offers you the space to understand what drives you into this ditch repeatedly. Once you understand and are aware of when you are about to blow your top, roll out the door mat (yourself) or just plain fumble along for others to witness, you can begin to work on expressing your wants and needs in an effective and impactful way in all areas of your life. Holding up a magnifying glass to a smaller sense of what it is to communicate helps you to expand your entire approach to communicating.

STOP & Upgrade your communication skillset!

Stop what you are doing.

Take a step back from whomever you are communicating with - yes, actually take a step back. Remove yourself from the situation temporarily and take a deep breath.

Observe your thoughts and feelings inside and notice what is going on around you. What are you thinking and feeling. Literally put your lens on zoom and try and see the whole picture.

Proceed mindfully. What does mindfully look like in the present situation?

Using mindfulness, you can learn to manage vulnerabilities and new ways to deliver your messages. When you allow yourself to observe what is happening without judgment, just for a moment, you can calm yourself down in a crisis or perceived crisis, empower yourself to not be a door mat and prevent yourself from fumbling along unsure of yourself and where you are going. You will instantly upgrade your communication skillset. There are many situations in which you can find yourself falling into the miscommunication ditch, and there are many ways to repave the road to help you get to where you need to be while inviting others to join you on the other side of the ditch.

Who can help you pave the road for smooth communication and get out of your own way?

A Life Coach can help you get out of your own way! There is great power in opening yourself up to reflective inquiry with a coach. Tossing and turning at night when you want to be sleeping or eating up your lunch hour ruminating instead of relaxing, and being defensive about how you behave in situations that require communication (there are many of these) will not get you to insight or dig you out of your ditch. It will get you frustrated, unproductive and alone. Working with a coach to unravel misconceptions or one-dimensional views about your communication storyline will lead to those "aha" moments that provide a dopamine hit to the brain. A coach will guide you through this cognitive process increasing your initiative and innovation around who you are and what you want your message to be, and how it is delivered. A coach will help you uncover bumps in the road before you go over them 100 miles per hour and find yourself flying into yet another communication ditch.

Go out and have new experiences with your new skills!

Imagine getting through difficult conversations, negotiations, and social media madness with an air of lightness and confidence. Make your new discoveries real by going out into the world and using the skills. I challenge you, if you will allow me to do so, to use STOP in at least one transmission of connection today. This skill is useful in even the friendliest of conversations. See what happens. Is this a new experience for you? One that can be built upon to repave your road of communication and change your storyline?

Until next week, continue to reimagine your life. What are your goals? What is blocking you from getting to the finish line? I'm here if you need me.

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